How do you know if the Crabs organization is a good fit for your child? Here is a list of things you should consider. Your child belongs on the Crabs if:

1) Your son has his driver's license in the 8th grade
2) You enjoy seeing your should be 10th grader play against 8th graders
3) You like seeing your son being ridiculed and humiliated by a fat red man that never played the game
4) Your child likes repeating grades
5) You live vicariously through your child and post pictures of him running over on age kids
6) You enjoy paying multiple years of private school tuition
7) You have a nickname for your child
8) You secretly wish you could have a Rabil cut but can't because you are bald
9) You live way beyond your means and think by playing for Crabs your stature in society will somehow improve
10) You find the end of the school year to be a total rush because it means your son can reclassify again