Holding back? Seems rational but it’s actually pathetic. You believe you’re using the university, but the sad truth is that they’re using you and your son. I’ll let you in on a little secret, there is no shortcut in the game of life and an elite school doesn’t make the man. It’s clear that you’re no man and it’s abundantly clear that you’re not raising a man. You are a fool raising a fool. You should get a vasectomy immediately and I’ll gladly contribute to the cost of the procedure.