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Re: Girls High School Lax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
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On September 1st do coaches just touch base with players they like or are there actual offers? I'm a new to the process and not sure how it works. Thanks

It all depends on the player and the coaches... Just remember that it is not a sprint. For most players it will be a process. Coaches have their lists and they will try to nail down the players that they have ranked highest but remember that No Coach gets all of their top recruits. If a coach is bringing in 9 recruits it is not likely that they will get 1 - 9 on their list. Every time a player at the top of a coaches list commits to another school the coach has to adjust their list and bump a player up. Make sure the the coaches on your daughters list know that your daughter has genuine interest in the program and the school. When coaches are looking at multiple players of similar ability, the coach will most likely offer a spot to the player who really wants to go to the school.

Completely agree with the comments above. Also keep in mind that there is a huge transfer portal now too. And not everyone in the portal is transferring for just their 5th grad year. Many undergrads in there looking for different schools and playing opportunities for 2-3 more years. Many coaches will prefer to take a proven college transfer player vs an unproven HS recruit. Less roster spots available overall and coaches taking longer than ever to pull the trigger. Reason you are still seeing many 22 commitments occurring. I wouldn’t be disappointed if it is fairly quiet on Sept 1st. It’s only day 1 and just know that it is a fairly long process if done correctly. Both sides need to be sure it’s a good fit. The transfer portal is full of undergrads who rushed to decide to eventually realize the college and/or team was not the right fit.

Also keep in mind that larger D1 rosters mean less playing time. Your daughter may want to consider a different division too where she will actually be able to play and contribute more. Lots of pre-Covid D1 recruits won’t see the field in post-Covid D1 until their senior year. Instead they could be a superstar on a D2/D3 roster with 4 years of playing time. A lot more fun to actually play. Too many older players on the roster ahead of them now. Look at the University of Maryland’s roster now as an example. So many transfers in just the past couple of weeks. I would detest to be a 21 or 22 recruit at Maryland. Unless you are considered an immediate impact player and year 1 starter, they will have to wait so much longer to actually see the field. And we all know Maryland never subs so these girls will truly never see the field in a game at all until possibly year 3-4 and some will never take the field in college. They will always be part of the practice squad.

Obviously you have an issue with Maryland. Many students, not just athletes transfer from many schools for a variety of reasons all of the time. To say that going DII or DIII will guarantee that a player will see playing time all four years and or be a superstar is not the best advise, you have no idea if a player will play or be a superstar. Many players do not get much playing time at the DII and DIII level no guarantee anywhere. Sure, if a player is offered a spot at a place like Maryland there is a very good chance that the player would start and be a superstar at the DII or DIII level. However, many people choose the school for a combination of Academics, Athletics, Social Life and overall college experience, playing time is just a part of the equation. Look to find the best fit, look for schools that your daughter would be happy at if she was not playing lacrosse.

Actually I have ZERO issues with Maryland. I am actually an alumnus and it was never a school on my daughter’s list. She wanted to go OOS. Maryland is too close. However, I have seen MD’s recent IG posts announcing their incoming transfers and know some girls who have played at UM in recent years and know CR’s coaching style. She doesn’t sub often. That is a well known fact. There are many HS superstar recruits over the years who have never seen the field in college. EVER. If these girls were good enough to be recruited by Maryland, they are good enough to be recruited by most teams. Obviously different coaches look for different things but a player who is the caliber of a UM recruit could probably play at any school. And as a UM alumni myself, it’s safe to say that there are many academic equivalent options as well - including reputation, school size, town size, academic offerings, etc. I’m just making the point that a 2023 recruit should not limit themselves to a specific school or division. The bigger and broader their list, the better chances of landing a school they will be happy with long term. I said there were MANY important factors to consider when choosing a college not just playing time. Bottom line is don’t just choose because of a player or parent ego. Choose the best overall school for you - including potential playing time. I’m guessing most girls would actually like to play in games in college vs just being part of the practice squad.

If only the girls who get regular playing time stay at a school coaches couldn’t even hold a practice. Players ride the bench at every school.

I'm not one of the previous posters, but yes, obviously every team has bench players. Some don't see much game action at all, some are regular subs every game, and some are in between. Coaches definitely have different styles in how they value and develop players from top to bottom. Maryland for example has a roster full of top ranked recruits and UA Senior All Americans, yet is known for limited subbing and is now bringing in transfers instead of developing and making the best with the players they chose to sign. It's their choice to do so - not bashing MD, UNC, etc. - but it is something for recruits to consider because even though the extra covid year is going to run its course, I'm guessing there will continue to be more transfer movement moving forward if players aren't happy with their situation after freshman and sophomore year. A kid who is truly top talent will have a chance to play at MD or UNC right away, so go for it committing to those schools. A player who is ok not getting game time, but wants to be on a team competing for conference and national championships, will be fine at those schools. A player who really wants playing time needs to think carefully and realistically about how their skills fit in at a particular program, and how much effort is put into developing players who have a lot of protentional but need a little more work to make an impact during games.

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Re: Girls High School Lax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Question re: D1 recruiting. DD getting invites now for prospect days in September. These are very small (say, capped at 30 players) and I would never be able to find them on my own, emails are coming directly from the coaches and not automatic responses. Money grabs or legit opportunities?

Yet, D2 school that is actively recruiting her already has her down for a prospect day weekend and no mention of the $100 or whatever these things tend to cost.

I realize it’s a drop in the bucket in lacrosse dollars but at this point, I’m not interested in forking over $100 for a prospect day when she could just be invited for a visit.

Don't know about D2, but D1 cn not have invite only clinics. Many coaches want to see and work with players at a camp or clinic before making an offer, and will communicate they'd love to see a player at xyz (by telling club coach, for example, if prior to 9/1 junior year). Maybe some send targeted emails prior to 9/1, but it can be hard to interpret level of interest without player talking to the coach or getting feedback through club. My daughter is older, but if I had a 2023 I would not sign up for anything in the fall until after 9/1. Wait and see who actually contacts your daughter and focus your time and money there. A prospect day prior to 9/1 could be helpful if you already know program is interested, or your daughter really, really wants to get on coach's radar, but probably not necessary for players a program has seen and already have high on their list.

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Re: Girls High School Lax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Everyone’s process is different. You can’t compare what’s happening to other girls to your daughters. Your daughter will end up where she’s meant to be. Anyone that discusses who is contacting their daughter or who is talking to a coach about their daughter is gaudy. I understand girls get excited, but they shouldn’t talk about their process to anyone & you should 100% give that advise to your daughter.

Just curious why you think parents or players should not talk to anyone about their process. Several parents asked me about the process for my kids, (I had no problem discussing it) I am sure some of my kids friends asked them as well. Personally I do not think it's a big deal, and I do not believe discussing the process with other parents has any affect on the process or where your child ends up being recruited or where your child commits. IMHO communication is helpful as long as you are not the type of person to become envious, jealous and or bitter.


Your process and the specifics are private. Communication is excellent as long as you’re not the type of person to to use it for your own sideline chest puffing. Discretion is the better part of valor.
Unfortunately, you will see how relationships change Sept 1st. Parents are going to compare your daughter to theirs & will say things that may discourage your process. I know this because I’ve been there. Best advise is to just keep your communications (specifics) to yourselves.

Some parents are delusional when it comes to their daughters ability and how she stacks up against other players. When the recruiting starts college coaches make it known where each player stands. Some parents can’t take it if other players (especially their daughters teammates ) get recruited ahead of their daughter. I have seen the bitterness first hand and it is ugly. This is the time when all of the BS excuses start and some parents will try to discredit or tear down the other players to anyone who will listen.

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Re: Girls High School Lax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Everyone’s process is different. You can’t compare what’s happening to other girls to your daughters. Your daughter will end up where she’s meant to be. Anyone that discusses who is contacting their daughter or who is talking to a coach about their daughter is gaudy. I understand girls get excited, but they shouldn’t talk about their process to anyone & you should 100% give that advise to your daughter.

Just curious why you think parents or players should not talk to anyone about their process. Several parents asked me about the process for my kids, (I had no problem discussing it) I am sure some of my kids friends asked them as well. Personally I do not think it's a big deal, and I do not believe discussing the process with other parents has any affect on the process or where your child ends up being recruited or where your child commits. IMHO communication is helpful as long as you are not the type of person to become envious, jealous and or bitter.


Your process and the specifics are private. Communication is excellent as long as you’re not the type of person to to use it for your own sideline chest puffing. Discretion is the better part of valor.
Unfortunately, you will see how relationships change Sept 1st. Parents are going to compare your daughter to theirs & will say things that may discourage your process. I know this because I’ve been there. Best advise is to just keep your communications (specifics) to yourselves.

Some parents are delusional when it comes to their daughters ability and how she stacks up against other players. When the recruiting starts college coaches make it known where each player stands. Some parents can’t take it if other players (especially their daughters teammates ) get recruited ahead of their daughter. I have seen the bitterness first hand and it is ugly. This is the time when all of the BS excuses start and some parents will try to discredit or tear down the other players to anyone who will listen.

Is that what you did?

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I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.

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Re: Girls High School Lax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.
Prospect days are rough-I would only go if the coach calls on Sept.1st and tells your daughter that they want to see her play. My daughters had hand written post cards to prospect days and we shelled out bucks to go to 2 prospect days at one of their tops schools. Then, on 9/1 crickets from that school-I was quite salty over that for a while. I also saw many, many girls get invites and go to fall prospect days. The coaches hand select one or two groups of their top tier kids and only watch them at the prospect days. A lot are money grabs.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.

It sounds like your DD will definitely have some schools to choose from and a supportive parent (or 2) to help her through the process. Just tell her to enjoy the process as much as she possibly can and to not get discouraged or super stressed if it takes longer than she was hoping or anticipating. Recruiting is definitely still affected by Covid but in the end it will definitely work out. I wish your daughter the best of luck!

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Sorry, I just do not get any of this nonsense about playing time. If everyone only considered going to a school where they were guaranteed to play no school would be able to field a team.

Pre-Covid average roster size at most D I programs was in the low to mid 30's, current roster size at least at the top schools is now 35 - 40 or so.
More competitive to get on the field due to larger rosters but in the end, most programs, "not just Maryland" play on average 16 - 17 players in competitive games (Syracuse & Northwestern play 20 plus even in very competitive 1 goal games.)

Below are the results 12 "one" goal games and the number of Players each team played in that game. (winning team on the left)

........... W --------------------- L ...................... the number listed is not the score, it's how many players played in the game.

Boston College 16 - North Carolina 17
Syracuse 21 - Northwestern 26
Navy 17 - Florida 16
Penn 14 - Hopkins 15
JMU 19 - High Point 14
Marist 18 - Vermont 19
Princeton 15 - Stony Brook 15
Fairfield 18 - Monmouth 16
Duke 18 - Maryland 16
Notre Dame 18 - Virginia 16
Drexel 16 - Towson 18
Elon 17 - Delaware 16

It doesn't matter if it is Maryland, High Point, Stony Brook, Drexel, or Penn, in competitive games teams average 16 - 17 players getting in the game. In less competitive game teams (including Maryland) play 20 plus players.

IMHO, athletes want to challenge themselves and compete, they do not want to drop down where they will not be challenged just so they can be the best player on the field. Now, if the player feels that they are in over their head that's a different story.

As far as developing players, maybe, just maybe the Maryland coach develops all of the players, you have to remember, all players are not equal so if the coach develops the weakest player on the team but also develops everyone else as well the weakest player may still be the weakest player.

At the end of the day, you can't have a program if you only have 16 or 17 players on the roster. It doesn't matter if it's Maryland or Marist, there are no guarantees and not everyone plays.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Sorry, I just do not get any of this nonsense about playing time. If everyone only considered going to a school where they were guaranteed to play no school would be able to field a team.

Pre-Covid average roster size at most D I programs was in the low to mid 30's, current roster size at least at the top schools is now 35 - 40 or so.
More competitive to get on the field due to larger rosters but in the end, most programs, "not just Maryland" play on average 16 - 17 players in competitive games (Syracuse & Northwestern play 20 plus even in very competitive 1 goal games.)

Below are the results 12 "one" goal games and the number of Players each team played in that game. (winning team on the left)

........... W --------------------- L ...................... the number listed is not the score, it's how many players played in the game.

Boston College 16 - North Carolina 17
Syracuse 21 - Northwestern 26
Navy 17 - Florida 16
Penn 14 - Hopkins 15
JMU 19 - High Point 14
Marist 18 - Vermont 19
Princeton 15 - Stony Brook 15
Fairfield 18 - Monmouth 16
Duke 18 - Maryland 16
Notre Dame 18 - Virginia 16
Drexel 16 - Towson 18
Elon 17 - Delaware 16

It doesn't matter if it is Maryland, High Point, Stony Brook, Drexel, or Penn, in competitive games teams average 16 - 17 players getting in the game. In less competitive game teams (including Maryland) play 20 plus players.

IMHO, athletes want to challenge themselves and compete, they do not want to drop down where they will not be challenged just so they can be the best player on the field. Now, if the player feels that they are in over their head that's a different story.

As far as developing players, maybe, just maybe the Maryland coach develops all of the players, you have to remember, all players are not equal so if the coach develops the weakest player on the team but also develops everyone else as well the weakest player may still be the weakest player.

At the end of the day, you can't have a program if you only have 16 or 17 players on the roster. It doesn't matter if it's Maryland or Marist, there are no guarantees and not everyone plays.
How can an athlete challenge themselves and compete if they NEVER see the field. There are girls that are "OK" with just being on the team and being a part of the practice squad with the hopes of eventually playing - but some don't get that chance.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
How can an athlete challenge themselves and compete if they NEVER see the field. There are girls that are "OK" with just being on the team and being a part of the practice squad with the hopes of eventually playing - but some don't get that chance.

Let’s try:

“Some do not earn that chance”

There’s no “equity” in college sports.

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Re: Girls High School Lax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.
Prospect days are rough-I would only go if the coach calls on Sept.1st and tells your daughter that they want to see her play. My daughters had hand written post cards to prospect days and we shelled out bucks to go to 2 prospect days at one of their tops schools. Then, on 9/1 crickets from that school-I was quite salty over that for a while. I also saw many, many girls get invites and go to fall prospect days. The coaches hand select one or two groups of their top tier kids and only watch them at the prospect days. A lot are money grabs.

We had that exact experience with Elon for our '21. Got a message on 9/1 that the coach was interested and wanted to schedule a call with the player and parents. Please come to our prospect day. Once we paid he ghosted us. Get to the prospect day and it was clear he had done the same thing to most of the girls there. Total money grab.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Sorry, I just do not get any of this nonsense about playing time. If everyone only considered going to a school where they were guaranteed to play no school would be able to field a team.

Pre-Covid average roster size at most D I programs was in the low to mid 30's, current roster size at least at the top schools is now 35 - 40 or so.
More competitive to get on the field due to larger rosters but in the end, most programs, "not just Maryland" play on average 16 - 17 players in competitive games (Syracuse & Northwestern play 20 plus even in very competitive 1 goal games.)

Below are the results 12 "one" goal games and the number of Players each team played in that game. (winning team on the left)

........... W --------------------- L ...................... the number listed is not the score, it's how many players played in the game.

Boston College 16 - North Carolina 17
Syracuse 21 - Northwestern 26
Navy 17 - Florida 16
Penn 14 - Hopkins 15
JMU 19 - High Point 14
Marist 18 - Vermont 19
Princeton 15 - Stony Brook 15
Fairfield 18 - Monmouth 16
Duke 18 - Maryland 16
Notre Dame 18 - Virginia 16
Drexel 16 - Towson 18
Elon 17 - Delaware 16

It doesn't matter if it is Maryland, High Point, Stony Brook, Drexel, or Penn, in competitive games teams average 16 - 17 players getting in the game. In less competitive game teams (including Maryland) play 20 plus players.

IMHO, athletes want to challenge themselves and compete, they do not want to drop down where they will not be challenged just so they can be the best player on the field. Now, if the player feels that they are in over their head that's a different story.

As far as developing players, maybe, just maybe the Maryland coach develops all of the players, you have to remember, all players are not equal so if the coach develops the weakest player on the team but also develops everyone else as well the weakest player may still be the weakest player.

At the end of the day, you can't have a program if you only have 16 or 17 players on the roster. It doesn't matter if it's Maryland or Marist, there are no guarantees and not everyone plays.
How can an athlete challenge themselves and compete if they NEVER see the field. There are girls that are "OK" with just being on the team and being a part of the practice squad with the hopes of eventually playing - but some don't get that chance.

They can challenge themselves and their teammates everyday in practice and in the weight room. Some will play, some will never play, it’s the same at every level in every sport.

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Originally Posted by cltlax
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.
Prospect days are rough-I would only go if the coach calls on Sept.1st and tells your daughter that they want to see her play. My daughters had hand written post cards to prospect days and we shelled out bucks to go to 2 prospect days at one of their tops schools. Then, on 9/1 crickets from that school-I was quite salty over that for a while. I also saw many, many girls get invites and go to fall prospect days. The coaches hand select one or two groups of their top tier kids and only watch them at the prospect days. A lot are money grabs.

We had that exact experience with Elon for our '21. Got a message on 9/1 that the coach was interested and wanted to schedule a call with the player and parents. Please come to our prospect day. Once we paid he ghosted us. Get to the prospect day and it was clear he had done the same thing to most of the girls there. Total money grab.

Elon did that?!?!?! That is on our list of schools. I never see their coaches on any lists for any of the tournaments we go to (we are a top MD team so we go to all of the big ones.).

They had a few small prospect days in the very beginning of the summer but nothing since then. Does this mean that they are not traditional recruiters? They don’t seem very responsive. Does anyone know?

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Sorry, I just do not get any of this nonsense about playing time. If everyone only considered going to a school where they were guaranteed to play no school would be able to field a team.

Pre-Covid average roster size at most D I programs was in the low to mid 30's, current roster size at least at the top schools is now 35 - 40 or so.
More competitive to get on the field due to larger rosters but in the end, most programs, "not just Maryland" play on average 16 - 17 players in competitive games (Syracuse & Northwestern play 20 plus even in very competitive 1 goal games.)

Below are the results 12 "one" goal games and the number of Players each team played in that game. (winning team on the left)

........... W --------------------- L ...................... the number listed is not the score, it's how many players played in the game.

Boston College 16 - North Carolina 17
Syracuse 21 - Northwestern 26
Navy 17 - Florida 16
Penn 14 - Hopkins 15
JMU 19 - High Point 14
Marist 18 - Vermont 19
Princeton 15 - Stony Brook 15
Fairfield 18 - Monmouth 16
Duke 18 - Maryland 16
Notre Dame 18 - Virginia 16
Drexel 16 - Towson 18
Elon 17 - Delaware 16

It doesn't matter if it is Maryland, High Point, Stony Brook, Drexel, or Penn, in competitive games teams average 16 - 17 players getting in the game. In less competitive game teams (including Maryland) play 20 plus players.

IMHO, athletes want to challenge themselves and compete, they do not want to drop down where they will not be challenged just so they can be the best player on the field. Now, if the player feels that they are in over their head that's a different story.

As far as developing players, maybe, just maybe the Maryland coach develops all of the players, you have to remember, all players are not equal so if the coach develops the weakest player on the team but also develops everyone else as well the weakest player may still be the weakest player.

At the end of the day, you can't have a program if you only have 16 or 17 players on the roster. It doesn't matter if it's Maryland or Marist, there are no guarantees and not everyone plays.
How can an athlete challenge themselves and compete if they NEVER see the field. There are girls that are "OK" with just being on the team and being a part of the practice squad with the hopes of eventually playing - but some don't get that chance.

They can challenge themselves and their teammates everyday in practice and in the weight room. Some will play, some will never play, it’s the same at every level in every sport.

Both of these responses back up the original poster. If you know you want to actually play all 4 years, pick a team or a division that will give you that opportunity. Maryland was only originally mentioned as an example because they are known for minimal subbing. Obviously most of the teams listed above do the same. With a post-Covid roster of 35-40 of ALL D1 level recruits, just know if you commit as a 22 or 23 that you probably will not see the field until your junior or senior year. Especially with such a large transfer portal. Every day there are more schools announcing new transfers into their programs. It's okay to be okay with just being on the practice squad and challenging their teammates in practice and in the weight room. It's also okay to play on a team where you will be one of the best players and play all 4 years. The original question was asking about recruiting and as a parent who has been through the process with a 2018 and 2022 DD, I have experienced it before and during covid. The college lacrosse landscape is very different for my 22 than it was for my 18 (who plays high level D1 lacrosse but will not be taking advantage of her 5th year next year because she already has a job lined up). However, my older daughter will not be telling her coach this until absolute necessary because she does not want to be unfairly punished for NOT taking her 5th year. She gets a lot of playing time now and is afraid that she will be penalized for not taking it.

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The situations regarding prospect days are really helpful to hear about. I thought we’d be done with the money grabs after September 1. Some of the prospect days are refreshingly inexpensive, but I do need to be careful because $100-150 x10 really adds up — that’s not including the travel!

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
The situations regarding prospect days are really helpful to hear about. I thought we’d be done with the money grabs after September 1. Some of the prospect days are refreshingly inexpensive, but I do need to be careful because $100-150 x10 really adds up — that’s not including the travel!
This is the litmus test that could be helpful for prospect days. If your daughter is personally invited by the coach and speaks to them on September 1 and it’s her dream school-then go for it!!

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Everyone is just a needle in the haystack.If your kid got an email invitation or even better a hand written post card I would jump at that opportunity.The rest is up to how you play at that prospect day.If you shine it’s was great if you don’t and the coach moves on then so be it.
$100-150 is a drop in the bucket compared to what you probably spent getting to this point.Finish the journey the money grab is almost over.

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Where can I find who was awarded the Suffolk County Girls High School awards for this past season?

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When your daughter gets a look on her profile from a T-30 school when she hasn’t sent anything out them it means…
1.- they saw you play while watching another recruits video?
2.-another coach said something?
3.- anyone know???

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
When your daughter gets a look on her profile from a T-30 school when she hasn’t sent anything out them it means…
1.- they saw you play while watching another recruits video?
2.-another coach said something?
3.- anyone know???

Not really sure. It could mean a lot of things. Over the past week, my daughters profile hits have been blowing up. We know of some schools who indicated they were interested to our directors, looking again, but many other taking a look that we were surprised at. Some have come back several times and watched or rewatched video. I think the schools are finalizing their tiers of recruits. We will all find out what it means in a couple weeks! Good luck!

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Where can I find who was awarded the Suffolk County Girls High School awards for this past season?
The only list I know of is All Long Island from Newsday.The all county,conference and divisions awards are basically awarded by your high school coach and the amount of slots given to a team is their final placement of the varsity season.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
When your daughter gets a look on her profile from a T-30 school when she hasn’t sent anything out them it means…
1.- they saw you play while watching another recruits video?
2.-another coach said something?
3.- anyone know???

Not really sure. It could mean a lot of things. Over the past week, my daughters profile hits have been blowing up. We know of some schools who indicated they were interested to our directors, looking again, but many other taking a look that we were surprised at. Some have come back several times and watched or rewatched video. I think the schools are finalizing their tiers of recruits. We will all find out what it means in a couple weeks! Good luck!

I think they are re-watching too. And I do think coaches talk, particularly coaches that may have seen them at a camp or clinic, because say my DD was at a clinic, suddenly views went way up in a particular geography and I think those coaches may know one another. But other schools will look one day and then the video seems to be circulating through and it's getting seen a couple times a day by coaches from that school. But who knows. Views can just be views. DD gets tons of views but DI's did not reach out to her club coach yet. She may be more a lower tier prospect, and that's OK, we'll know soon enough. I just need to keep DD from getting distracted by the emotional toll the waiting is taking.

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Now that the Seniors started college, will Section XI get the plaques out for All County? Or is Tom Combs still on his power trip of being in control and allowing fall sports full steam ahead??? DON’T forget what those in charge did to our athletes!!!

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Originally Posted by cltlax
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
I could see some crazy parents trying to sabotage a kid they thought was getting looks over their own, so for that reason I think it makes sense to keep recruiting conversations to oneself.

I'm the prospect invite mom from above, thanks so much for the helpful feedback. I suspect that it's a legit opportunity, I never would have found the link to sign her up without a very directed email from the coach herself. But it's certainly different than the d2 invite which gave us several weekend options, social time with the girls, campus tour, team meet and greet etc. I think we will see what happens on Sept 1 and have a better idea of what the big picture looks like. DD's dream schools will not be contacting her to play lacrosse (UNC, MD not happening), but she is open to finding a new dream school based on the opportunities that present.
Prospect days are rough-I would only go if the coach calls on Sept.1st and tells your daughter that they want to see her play. My daughters had hand written post cards to prospect days and we shelled out bucks to go to 2 prospect days at one of their tops schools. Then, on 9/1 crickets from that school-I was quite salty over that for a while. I also saw many, many girls get invites and go to fall prospect days. The coaches hand select one or two groups of their top tier kids and only watch them at the prospect days. A lot are money grabs.

We had that exact experience with Elon for our '21. Got a message on 9/1 that the coach was interested and wanted to schedule a call with the player and parents. Please come to our prospect day. Once we paid he ghosted us. Get to the prospect day and it was clear he had done the same thing to most of the girls there. Total money grab.

Question for all, want to respectfully ask, why play for a university like Elon that no one really knows.. like your kid still has to go to school there and is gonna have that on her resume. Why not go to a more prestigious school and try to walk on or play club. Reality check here but lacrosse ain’t paying the bills. The goal is to get access into a great school that you wouldn’t otherwise have gotten into to set you up for a career. does anyone else see it this way? Why send your kids to lower tier academic universities?

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Just my opinion from what I’ve seen in recruiting and picking schools.On the athletic side you have to love the coach and like your conference that you will be traveling and competing in and for academics which is the most important as we can all agree must be picked according to your intelligence,classroom habits and ability to take test and handle workload.
We all want our kids to graduate from prestigious or just higher end academic institutions but if your kid can’t handle it will be a recipe for disaster.Strive for what’s attainable and be the best at it.College sports is a whole other level not matter what division.The workload is two fold of varsity teams and college professors rarely cut you a lot of slack because you play lax.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Just my opinion from what I’ve seen in recruiting and picking schools.On the athletic side you have to love the coach and like your conference that you will be traveling and competing in and for academics which is the most important as we can all agree must be picked according to your intelligence,classroom habits and ability to take test and handle workload.
We all want our kids to graduate from prestigious or just higher end academic institutions but if your kid can’t handle it will be a recipe for disaster.Strive for what’s attainable and be the best at it.College sports is a whole other level not matter what division.The workload is two fold of varsity teams and college professors rarely cut you a lot of slack because you play lax.

I agree with this mostly, except that once you’re accepted, most schools im the top 50 are pretty similar as far as difficulty in the classroom. I have two in school. One at an Ivy, the other a big 10. They take similar classes and they are essentially the same. I suppose if you are taking a very difficult major it could be different. Just my experience. My advice is to go to the highest ranked school you can get into, unless you’re a kid who’s only goal is to major in lacrosse and win a National Championship.

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With so many factors at play, Elon may be the best option for some kids. They have a really good reputation as a great place for kids with learning disabilities and it’s a beautiful campus and reasonably priced for a private institution. Not all kids are top 30 material, but may be gifted athletes capable of playing D1. Elon is well known in the south. My impression is that they recruit through club directors— our club has sent some girls there.

Like you though I’m looking for the best academic spot my kid can get into with lax. Where that will be remains to be seen and Junior years grades will be a factor. Thanks, covid!

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
With so many factors at play, Elon may be the best option for some kids. They have a really good reputation as a great place for kids with learning disabilities and it’s a beautiful campus and reasonably priced for a private institution. Not all kids are top 30 material, but may be gifted athletes capable of playing D1. Elon is well known in the south. My impression is that they recruit through club directors— our club has sent some girls there.

Like you though I’m looking for the best academic spot my kid can get into with lax. Where that will be remains to be seen and Junior years grades will be a factor. Thanks, covid!


Elon is a beautiful school and has a good lacrosse program.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Sorry, I just do not get any of this nonsense about playing time. If everyone only considered going to a school where they were guaranteed to play no school would be able to field a team.

Pre-Covid average roster size at most D I programs was in the low to mid 30's, current roster size at least at the top schools is now 35 - 40 or so.
More competitive to get on the field due to larger rosters but in the end, most programs, "not just Maryland" play on average 16 - 17 players in competitive games (Syracuse & Northwestern play 20 plus even in very competitive 1 goal games.)

Below are the results 12 "one" goal games and the number of Players each team played in that game. (winning team on the left)

........... W --------------------- L ...................... the number listed is not the score, it's how many players played in the game.

Boston College 16 - North Carolina 17
Syracuse 21 - Northwestern 26
Navy 17 - Florida 16
Penn 14 - Hopkins 15
JMU 19 - High Point 14
Marist 18 - Vermont 19
Princeton 15 - Stony Brook 15
Fairfield 18 - Monmouth 16
Duke 18 - Maryland 16
Notre Dame 18 - Virginia 16
Drexel 16 - Towson 18
Elon 17 - Delaware 16

It doesn't matter if it is Maryland, High Point, Stony Brook, Drexel, or Penn, in competitive games teams average 16 - 17 players getting in the game. In less competitive game teams (including Maryland) play 20 plus players.

IMHO, athletes want to challenge themselves and compete, they do not want to drop down where they will not be challenged just so they can be the best player on the field. Now, if the player feels that they are in over their head that's a different story.

As far as developing players, maybe, just maybe the Maryland coach develops all of the players, you have to remember, all players are not equal so if the coach develops the weakest player on the team but also develops everyone else as well the weakest player may still be the weakest player.

At the end of the day, you can't have a program if you only have 16 or 17 players on the roster. It doesn't matter if it's Maryland or Marist, there are no guarantees and not everyone plays.
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Sorry, I just do not get any of this nonsense about playing time. If everyone only considered going to a school where they were guaranteed to play no school would be able to field a team.

Pre-Covid average roster size at most D I programs was in the low to mid 30's, current roster size at least at the top schools is now 35 - 40 or so.
More competitive to get on the field due to larger rosters but in the end, most programs, "not just Maryland" play on average 16 - 17 players in competitive games (Syracuse & Northwestern play 20 plus even in very competitive 1 goal games.)

Below are the results 12 "one" goal games and the number of Players each team played in that game. (winning team on the left)

........... W --------------------- L ...................... the number listed is not the score, it's how many players played in the game.

Boston College 16 - North Carolina 17
Syracuse 21 - Northwestern 26
Navy 17 - Florida 16
Penn 14 - Hopkins 15
JMU 19 - High Point 14
Marist 18 - Vermont 19
Princeton 15 - Stony Brook 15
Fairfield 18 - Monmouth 16
Duke 18 - Maryland 16
Notre Dame 18 - Virginia 16
Drexel 16 - Towson 18
Elon 17 - Delaware 16

It doesn't matter if it is Maryland, High Point, Stony Brook, Drexel, or Penn, in competitive games teams average 16 - 17 players getting in the game. In less competitive game teams (including Maryland) play 20 plus players.

IMHO, athletes want to challenge themselves and compete, they do not want to drop down where they will not be challenged just so they can be the best player on the field. Now, if the player feels that they are in over their head that's a different story.

As far as developing players, maybe, just maybe the Maryland coach develops all of the players, you have to remember, all players are not equal so if the coach develops the weakest player on the team but also develops everyone else as well the weakest player may still be the weakest player.

At the end of the day, you can't have a program if you only have 16 or 17 players on the roster. It doesn't matter if it's Maryland or Marist, there are no guarantees and not everyone plays.

These facts and stats are going to really upset people who just like to stick to narratives like “Maryland never subs”. Most of the top teams play 16-18 players in tight games. These parents don’t understand that college coaches are paid to win games. There is no statistical evidence that says subbing =winning. College coaches know their teams best and just because a girl was a All American in HS, doesnt mean they will be great college players. I think teams like UNC, MD have proven that they know what they are doing in terms of putting the best TEAM on the field. There is a reason these teams are consistently in the final 4 and girls who don’t see the field much still love being on the team.

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As someone who lives in the northeast and works in Fintech I am never sending my kids Elon (also don’t see many LI girls on the roster like Cuse or BC). Especially after what was confirmed earlier in this thread. The south can keep it. Would rather nassau community college.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
As someone who lives in the northeast and works in Fintech I am never sending my kids Elon (also don’t see many LI girls on the roster like Cuse or BC). Especially after what was confirmed earlier in this thread. The south can keep it. Would rather nassau community college.

What are you talking about? Nobody cares where you will or will not send your kids to college. If you do not see many LI girls on rosters like Cuse and BC you obviously aren't looking.

What was the purpose of your post, are you talking to yourself?

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Has anyone seen the Labor Day D1scovery Day Showcase Camp taking place at Cantiague Park? Seems like a good event for only $189 with the top coaching and exposure the 44 players would get from just the list of schools so far.

It's a soft period but D1's are allowed to be there and it's the only event in September that I can find locally so I am going to register my daughter - just wanted to get others thoughts. Thank you.

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Do schools pay all expenses for both parents to accompany their daughter on an official visit?

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Do schools pay all expenses for both parents to accompany their daughter on an official visit?

No, they dont.
For certain schools you can talk your way into going along all expenses paid. It happened with my in laws. Player was a goalie.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Do schools pay all expenses for both parents to accompany their daughter on an official visit?

No, they dont.
For certain schools you can talk your way into going along all expenses paid. It happened with my in laws. Player was a goalie.


They did for my daughter.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Do schools pay all expenses for both parents to accompany their daughter on an official visit?

No, they dont.
For certain schools you can talk your way into going along all expenses paid. It happened with my in laws. Player was a goalie.


They did for my daughter.

Every situation is different. Recruits are not considered equal by coaches, programs have different budgets, not every player that a coach talks to is invited on an official visit.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Do schools pay all expenses for both parents to accompany their daughter on an official visit?

No, they dont.
For certain schools you can talk your way into going along all expenses paid. It happened with my in laws. Player was a goalie.


They did for my daughter.

Every situation is different. Recruits are not considered equal by coaches, programs have different budgets, not every player that a coach talks to is invited on an official visit.

My daughter took 4 official visits, the West coast teams paid her airfare, we paid for ours. They paid all other expenses for all of us. Room and food. The two east coast teams paid for everything including our gas and tolls. Obviously no airfare on the two east coast teams she visited.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Do schools pay all expenses for both parents to accompany their daughter on an official visit?

No, they dont.
For certain schools you can talk your way into going along all expenses paid. It happened with my in laws. Player was a goalie.


They did for my daughter.

Every situation is different. Recruits are not considered equal by coaches, programs have different budgets, not every player that a coach talks to is invited on an official visit.

My daughter took 4 official visits, the West coast teams paid her airfare, we paid for ours. They paid all other expenses for all of us. Room and food. The two east coast teams paid for everything including our gas and tolls. Obviously no airfare on the two east coast teams she visited.

That's awesome! Did your daughter receive formal offers on the visits, including scholarship amounts? Did they give her a time frame or try to sway you away from visiting other schools? Thanks for any information you can share.

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For official visits- schools can pay for everything from the travel for the PSA. They can and will also pay for the parents. However only football and basketball parents are allowed to have their travel Cost paid. Lacrosse parents are going to have to buy their airfare but most colleges pay for everything on the official.
Side note- if a recruiting violation occurs talk to compliance-hopefully no one will have to deal with that

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