The holdback thing is just a sign of the times. How many top college kids wrote their college essays...on their own? We live in an age of intense helicopter parenting. For parents that are very into their kids, the sky is the limit. Hold back, summer studies at Harvard or Stanford in the 8th grade, black belt in karate by 4th grade, concert pianist by middle school, SAT tutors, etc. What separates the men from the boys, if such a term can be used nowadays, is when the kid has the talent and drive. You can push a kid all you want, if the talent and drive aren't there, he can play at some level of his craft, but not at the top level. You can fool a lot of coaches and once in awhile you'll see a kid make a top team he shouldn't have made, but eventually that gets figured out. Let's just say many of these college coaches aren't the sharpest tools in the shed. Enjoy the ride.