I’m just wondering how common this is:
(Please understand that I don’t want to give away too many identifying details)
My daughter is a 23 who is committed to a good school.
The recruiting class have had a few events where they got to meet and socialize. The problem is is that there is one girl amongst the recruits is who likes to stir-the-drama.
She has repeatedly purposefully excluded some of the recruits more than once so it’s not an oversight. (I mean as a parent I would seriously notice and have a talk with my kid) Just plain mean and juvenile. This has left some of these girls confused and hurt. It’s not like these girls are standard shy wallflowers, they are awesome kids!
I was just hoping that this kind of behavior goes away in college or it’s not the big deal it is while in high school. I keep telling my daughter to brush it off and that if the coach ever found out that this girl would be a big target.. Also the older girls would probably relish the opportunity to put this girl in her place. I just want this behavior to be not such a big deal as they get older. They are supposed to be a team.
Toxic classmates can ruin a kids time at school. If all of the other girls are on the same page nip this in the bud . Call it out as nicely as positive shine a light on it now don’t sit back and wait until they are on campus. If one or two girls are left out of plans or a group chat say “ that was a mistake” and add the others to the plan or gc. Don’t allow this one girl to be a negative leader.
It goes the other way as well, sometimes the majority of the team doesn't want to be around a girl because she is the one that is toxic. People should not be forced to spend time outside of "team stuff, practice, games, lift etc..." with nasty people. I would imagine that in elementary school, middle school and HS these kids bullied, put down and tried to exclude kids but once they get to college they are the one that people do not want to associate with. I'm sure the parents that raise these nasty kids will be making phone calls in college as well.
