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Lax truths

Love reading these forums and the variety of opinions. Some are very helpful and some are laughable. Having been through the process, here are what I believe, to me, tone the “truths” and by truth, it applies to the bell curve majority. Disclaimer: these truths are really just opinion and you know what they say about people with opinions…

1. Many parents are trying to live vicariously through their children. Thus they don’t make the best lax decisions because they are doing it for themselves md not their kids but they still try to justify it.
2. I’ve seen the majority of lax parents make a lax decision for their college choice, not an academic decision, which is a short term decision with long term consequences
3. The vast majority of successful lacrosse players are reclass / PG. Period. It works. But not for all….
4. …as those successful players that reclassed are not representative of the true outcomes of most the holdbacks. The majority end up not at duke or the ivies. People need to look at the people who delayed college by 1-3 years and ended up exactly where they would have been had they not held back. That is where the majority of holdbacks end up, back at square 1 or square 2, not square 100 like everyone believes they end up.
5. Lacrosse is finite. Anybody who dreams of making a living out of playing lacrosse should consider a different career path
6. Stop comparing lacrosse success to basketball and football success. It shows you just want to be a wannabe in a niche sport. Those NIL deals are not for you. And don’t use a Georgia qb as the gold standard for being closer to 30 then 20 years old as the dream we should be chasing.
7. See #4 for football and basketball as again, we only see the successes and not the majority of the people who don’t go on to succeed.
8. Holdbacks are not illegal. They are allowed.
9. Holdbacks are a [Censored] way to get ahead in life. Can’t succeed in your own grade? Go ahead and beat up on kids younger than you. You can use “holding back” to get ahead in life at this stage in your life but that “get out of jail card” is a one time use only. You can’t use a holdback to solve all your deficiencies; it usually just hides them. But everyone who holds back and ended up not succeeded has always found a way to justify their holdback and come up with some reason why it was good. No one has enough courage to say it was a mistake.
10. The majority of holdbacks don’t go on to UNC, Virginia, duke and ivies. See #4
11. Lacrosse is quickly becoming an niche sport that caters to the wealthy. Equity is becoming a huge problem.
12. Club lacrosse is a business. They do not care about your recruitment unless it benefits them
13. College and club lacrosse are the chokepoints of what is ruining lacrosse. They want older kids because they are more mature, faster and stronger and will do anything to get them. That’s why they want holdbacks.
14. No no one cares about club lacrosse in high school. Check the 2022-2024 forums. No one posted in them because no one cares
15. Prospect days are purely a way for coaches to make money, unless you are actually invited
16. Speaking of making money, showcases are also in it to make money
17. Guess what? There’s nothing wrong with making money. But don’t fall prey to every event that spams you with an email inviting you to super duper future phenoms apex first class 1% all american showcase. Chose your events carefully. Avoid most with an “all star” team. Use these events to get film.
18. To get recruited you will have to do the dirty work and get yourself exposed at some of these money making showcases and prospect days. Make film, contact coaches and teams and most of all be good because that is what you are eventually going to be judged on
19. #18 is a farce. The best way into college is through connections. I hope your high school coach or if you are lucky enough to have a club coach that cares, has those connections
20. There is nothing wrong with playing lacrosse in college. Do it to have fun. And don’t think for a moment that yiu can’t play play lacrosse in college. There are 75 d2 and 175 d3 schools all with spots available. That being said, see point #2
21. If you are pretty good then you can play d1. Everybody thinks d1 is unobtainable but there are plenty of d1 schools that are not that good that you can play at but…see point# 22
22. However don’t play d1 just for the sake of saying you played d1. You are much better off at a NESCAc or centennial d3 school then saying you played for Wagner hampton NJIT VMi sacred heart clevelandst vmi bellarmine Siena Detroitmercy LIU Manhattan etc. you get what I’m saying. The bottom 33 of lacrosse d1 are not that good and academically maybe not the strongest.
23. D2 is a good option but they are not the strongest academically
24. The majority of lax players go into finance. You want to go to a school with good education and good connections. And for goodness sake, when being recruited it is much better to say you are undecided then say anything in STEM. Many coaches don’t want students who study STEM. They want athletes.
25. Good luck being recruited if you play defense. They are the hardest to get recruited. Coaches want goalies, fogo, attackmen first. Then middies. Then LSM and SSDM and then dpoles last. The prospect days always seem to have too many dpoles and not enough middies.
26. If you are truly a superstar in the sport, then almost none of this applies to you. The rest of you? This is all “truth”
27. No matter where you go to school it will end up fine as soon as you stop chasing the lacrosse dream. Enjoy this time with your kids. It’s supposed to be fun. And please stop living vicariously through your kids. A wise man said don’t let lacrosse use you, you use lacrosse.

Remember this does not apply to everyone, it applies to the bell curve majority. Congrats to the few who beat the system or are lucky outliers. My condolences to those who spent 1-3 years reclassing and chasing a dream and missed out future income and personal growth. And yes, my two kids were not holdbacks and are doing perfectly fine playing lacrosse in college.