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Re: Express North at Long Ireland tournament
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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Really??? Wins and losses? Charity money? Filling a spot? A tshirt? This is what we are concerned about? Has anyone given a thought to saftey concerns of playing these older kids against these young children? All to make a few extra dollars for the cause? At what cost? You cant tell me this is not a huge saftey / legal issue. You are delusional if you think there is no problem with running kids 2 years older at this stage in their development. It is insane to me that organizations pull this crap and it will all come to an end when you are the parent of the younger child who is severly physically hurt.


Well said, couldn't agree more it's just sad that organizations & parents have resorted to the win at any cost mentality and then try to justify using older players. It's really sad that this where this great sport is going.


While I generally don't disapprove of anything anyone has said about LIENorth, they are not the only one to blame here. Has anyone said anything to Long Ireland Lacrosse, the event organizer? That would be the surest way to stop future abuses. Sure LIENorth played in a game they shouldn't have, but it seems to have been done at the request, or at a minimum, the consent, of Long Ireland Lacrosse. How could they not know of the age disparities and the risks to the children?

Long Ireland Lacrosse is as much to blame as anyone else. In all of your hate speech have you said anything about Long Ireland Lacrosse or do you all just like harping on LIENorth because you lost? Why not ask for a boycott of this charity or event! Insist that Back of the Cage not accept their advertising dollars. Come on people, spread the blame accordingly! If Long Ireland Lacrosse allowed this to happen in this game, don't you think it happened elsewhere or in the future?

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From what I've read - The LIE team filled in an empty spot with 24hrs notice - albeit in a division they were too skilled to be in (but THIS WAS APPROVED BY THE TOURNAMENT DIRECTOR). They played weak hand, half defense and passed the ball instead of shooting. These are all very NORMAL approaches in a situation when a team is notably stronger - it evens out the game considerably. My sons have been on both sides of the advantage in the past and as a parent I respected the coaches tremendously - as no one likes a blatant blow out at a charity tournament like this.

No one complained the boys were overly aggressive/physical on the field. If that were the case - I would think the refs would have put a stop to it immediately and this post would be going in a different direction. But instead - this post is full of immaturity, whining, sour grapes. accusations & name calling.

IMO - Lack of communication from the Tournament Director (who was probably just trying to do the right thing) and mistakes by many were made throughout the 48 hours. I'm sure if it's covered by your news12 threat -- you and the parents on your team won't come out smelling like roses either.

Have a drink, blow off some steam outside of your keyboard courage -- go toss the ball around with your son. Life is too short to get twisted about one charity tournament that may have been mishandled from the top down. And if this age thing really pisses you off - don't have your son play club ball anywhere - it's not going away and no club is free of it. Middle school club ball is even more fun to watch: puberty vs. non puberty players that may or may not have been reclassed. 85lb attackman vs a 150+defenseman. I watch and cringe through it every weekend.

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Well said! Safety should be number one! And this is why it is so outrageous that these people see nothing wrong with having older players vs younger ones.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
From what I've read - The LIE team filled in an empty spot with 24hrs notice - albeit in a division they were too skilled to be in (but THIS WAS APPROVED BY THE TOURNAMENT DIRECTOR). They played weak hand, half defense and passed the ball instead of shooting. These are all very NORMAL approaches in a situation when a team is notably stronger - it evens out the game considerably. My sons have been on both sides of the advantage in the past and as a parent I respected the coaches tremendously - as no one likes a blatant blow out at a charity tournament like this.

No one complained the boys were overly aggressive/physical on the field. If that were the case - I would think the refs would have put a stop to it immediately and this post would be going in a different direction. But instead - this post is full of immaturity, whining, sour grapes. accusations & name calling.

IMO - Lack of communication from the Tournament Director (who was probably just trying to do the right thing) and mistakes by many were made throughout the 48 hours. I'm sure if it's covered by your news12 threat -- you and the parents on your team won't come out smelling like roses either.

Have a drink, blow off some steam outside of your keyboard courage -- go toss the ball around with your son. Life is too short to get twisted about one charity tournament that may have been mishandled from the top down. And if this age thing really pisses you off - don't have your son play club ball anywhere - it's not going away and no club is free of it. Middle school club ball is even more fun to watch: puberty vs. non puberty players that may or may not have been reclassed. 85lb attackman vs a 150+defenseman. I watch and cringe through it every weekend.

Originally Posted by Anonymous
From what I've read - The LIE team filled in an empty spot with 24hrs notice - albeit in a division they were too skilled to be in (but THIS WAS APPROVED BY THE TOURNAMENT DIRECTOR). They played weak hand, half defense and passed the ball instead of shooting. These are all very NORMAL approaches in a situation when a team is notably stronger - it evens out the game considerably. My sons have been on both sides of the advantage in the past and as a parent I respected the coaches tremendously - as no one likes a blatant blow out at a charity tournament like this.

No one complained the boys were overly aggressive/physical on the field. If that were the case - I would think the refs would have put a stop to it immediately and this post would be going in a different direction. But instead - this post is full of immaturity, whining, sour grapes. accusations & name calling.

IMO - Lack of communication from the Tournament Director (who was probably just trying to do the right thing) and mistakes by many were made throughout the 48 hours. I'm sure if it's covered by your news12 threat -- you and the parents on your team won't come out smelling like roses either.

Have a drink, blow off some steam outside of your keyboard courage -- go toss the ball around with your son. Life is too short to get twisted about one charity tournament that may have been mishandled from the top down. And if this age thing really pisses you off - don't have your son play club ball anywhere - it's not going away and no club is free of it. Middle school club ball is even more fun to watch: puberty vs. non puberty players that may or may not have been reclassed. 85lb attackman vs a 150+defenseman. I watch and cringe through it every weekend.


Just to clarify something that I have seen in this post and throughout this thread is that Express was asked to fill a spot with 24hours notice of the tournament. This is absolutely false as they where on the schedule which was out on Tuesday afternoon. Clearly not 24 hours notice. Stop trying to justify why older players used.


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so if we want our team to be better we should play better teams, i get that....whats your excuse for your players playing down coach? to make your team feel better? speaking on both sides of your mouth is fun! kinda like not being upfront with all the teams you faced this weekend.

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nailed it

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Originally Posted by meco24
Here's a hypothetical...

Express enters the John A. Smith charity tournament. In the bracket are the 2026 (not 2025) teams Schmigloo*, Team 92*, Leprosy*, Inlaws*, and a few others. Just making up some completely random names... Express comes out on top in all 3 of their games! Wait, no celebrating, this is a charity tournament. How dare you be happy. Is that a grin, you devil you? You should be ashamed of yourself!!! This isn't the olymipcs, stop acting like it. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Fingers are wagging at you.

While getting over being ashamed of your happiness, you check the schedule on tourney machine, and next you are going up against a team named SadLax*.

Is it the Olympics? Of course not, you remind yourself. You tell the kids just have some fun against SadLax*. "Don't worry Johnny, this is a charity game, you should be whistling skippity doo dah, not worrying about ground balls. It's just a silly silly game."

At this point you also make sure your kids realize there are starving kids in Ethiopia and this game doesn't mean a single thing. Even the WSYL means nothing, zero, nada, in the grand scheme of things, you remind your son. They are 9 years old afterall. They need these reminders. We ALL need these reminders, let's be honest. Some of them are still 8, buy I digress. None of them are 10, but I digress even more.

Almost half way through the receiving end of an a$$ whipping it is revealed to you that SadLax* is playing with older kids. What in tarnation!... is not what you'd say or think. Rather you think hey, that's AOK!!! My boy is out there having a jolly time. Who cares that this is the 4th game my 10 (whoops I mean 9 or 8) year old has played hard in the July heat and humidity. So long as the boys remember they are playing for John A. Smith they'll be grinning from ear to ear even if the score is 9-1. In fact, I'm in such a charitable mood right now, that I hope the other team scores more and more and more so they have more fun fun fun! YEA!!!!

SadLax* will not, by any means, boast of this on Twitter under the headline that starts "SadLax* 2026..." It's not the Olympics to them. No, no, no sireee!!! SadLax* will remind you that it's not the Olympics.

End of hypothetical....

There is no one on earth who can say with a straight face that they wouldn't be bothered.

But SadLax* filled in last minute and told the organizers. No one told you (or other teams you played). You find this out a little too late, but all good. Carry on. Still not the Olympics though.

*Names are fictitious. Any resemblance to actual teams, active or defunct, is purely coincidental.


Now that was funny thanks for the laughs. I almost dropped my solo cup

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Take the higher road and handle it maturely. I'd like to hear what the tournament director had to say when you voiced your displeasure.

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There was no notice to my team and this is about safety, not winning.

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If it was about safety, those of you most concerned would have sat your child and said NO WAY is my kid going out there. I for one would never sacrifice my sons health for a lacrosse game. So those of you spouting off about the dangers of this event, what did you do? If your son played you are a hypocrite, and quite frankly a lousy parent for letting him go out there with the knowledge that his health and wellbeing were in jeapordy. Be honest, It's all about the win, always has been and always will be. Just saying folks!!!

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
If it was about safety, those of you most concerned would have sat your child and said NO WAY is my kid going out there. I for one would never sacrifice my sons health for a lacrosse game. So those of you spouting off about the dangers of this event, what did you do? If your son played you are a hypocrite, and quite frankly a lousy parent for letting him go out there with the knowledge that his health and wellbeing were in jeapordy. Be honest, It's all about the win, always has been and always will be. Just saying folks!!!


Express coach admitted to having older players toward the end of the championship game. I sure if it was know prior to the start of the game the coaches would have never put them on the field. The Express coach went over to Levittown coaches before the start of the game and wished them luck. That would have been the appropriate time to divulge they were majority of older players. That didn't happen.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
If it was about safety, those of you most concerned would have sat your child and said NO WAY is my kid going out there. I for one would never sacrifice my sons health for a lacrosse game. So those of you spouting off about the dangers of this event, what did you do? If your son played you are a hypocrite, and quite frankly a lousy parent for letting him go out there with the knowledge that his health and wellbeing were in jeapordy. Be honest, It's all about the win, always has been and always will be. Just saying folks!!!


I don't mean to beat a dead horse, but the problem was at least 2 of the teams were not notified. Chalk it up to miscommunication. Forgiven as far as I'm concerned at this point. It happened. Learn from it and move on. We've knowingly played older teams in the past. It's a different animal when everyone kids, coaches, parents know what they are up against going in. If the younger ones know they are going up against older kids, they can put the brakes on a little too.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
If it was about safety, those of you most concerned would have sat your child and said NO WAY is my kid going out there. I for one would never sacrifice my sons health for a lacrosse game. So those of you spouting off about the dangers of this event, what did you do? If your son played you are a hypocrite, and quite frankly a lousy parent for letting him go out there with the knowledge that his health and wellbeing were in jeapordy. Be honest, It's all about the win, always has been and always will be. Just saying folks!!!


Express coach admitted to having older players toward the end of the championship game. I sure if it was know prior to the start of the game the coaches would have never put them on the field. The Express coach went over to Levittown coaches before the start of the game and wished them luck. That would have been the appropriate time to divulge they were majority of older players. That didn't happen.


Dude, really? You want me to believe not one parent of an opponent knew they were older? Not a single parent complained? I've been around lacrosse for a long time, no one is that naive. It was for the win, I know and you know it. Safety and the well being of kids is secondary to the tshirt. Let's not play the naive game here.

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Good point above about not letting your kids play if you were *truly* concerned about safety throughout the game (not just jilted by the fill in decision). I have watched parents pull their 4th grade son out of a very competitive football game (via talking to the coach mid game) because of a safety concern on size difference and aggressiveness of the kid he was being matched up with. The kid pulled out was mortified - but the parents felt they were justified. Further investigation on that particular larger kid -- he did belong in the league and he was just a phenomenal give it all player. Go figure -kids the same age aren't always the same size.

If this thread was really about safety - fine. But come on - it's not. Safety wasn't even discussed until PAGE 6 of this thread. I haven't seen a complaint about aggressive play or a dangerous hit one of the kids received.

Learning experience for all. Communication breakdown happened. Your kids played up against older, more skilled kids and probably learned a thing or two on the field by their experience. No one was hurt - the charity made money. Lessons learned. This thread has run it's course.

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I highly doubt there were any 2024 kids playing in that game. The 2024s were in a 2day/4 game tournament in Sachem. Not exactly around the block by LI standards - especially with weekend traffic.

If you are getting your 2024 information from your kids that were talking on the field - let's not forget - the players sometimes talk smack out there on the field.

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In lacrosse, if you are not playing down, you are playing up. Get used to it. It is the norm. My experience has been that it is most prevalent in the Balt-DC area and in CT/Westchester area but no region is innocent. Not by a long shot.

I hate it and frankly laugh at those pathetic snowflakes that just need to be good at something, even if that means playing younger kids in order to show well.

It will stop when the college coaches stop encouraging it (never happen) or the insurance company that provides coverage for basically all players and teams (via US Lacrosse membership) demands that it stop.

I'd bet on the lawyers before the coaches though I'm surprised it hasn't happened yet. Thank goodness some poor kid hasn't been severely injured yet, but sadly that is what it might take.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
In lacrosse, if you are not playing down, you are playing up. Get used to it. It is the norm. My experience has been that it is most prevalent in the Balt-DC area and in CT/Westchester area but no region is innocent. Not by a long shot.

I hate it and frankly laugh at those pathetic snowflakes that just need to be good at something, even if that means playing younger kids in order to show well.

It will stop when the college coaches stop encouraging it (never happen) or the insurance company that provides coverage for basically all players and teams (via US Lacrosse membership) demands that it stop.

I'd bet on the lawyers before the coaches though I'm surprised it hasn't happened yet. Thank goodness some poor kid hasn't been severely injured yet, but sadly that is what it might take.


Man that stinks. Personally I can't stand when there are accusations against other players. I'm not naive, but I'm not the type to accuse someone of being older no matter how big/strong/fast/skilled they are. There was just one time in the 50+ games over the last 3+ years that I was convinced someone was too old. And that was back in 1st grade... No matter how much my radar is going off, I keep it to myself and make sure my son doesn't get jilted into believing anyone better than him or his teammates must be older. I won't let that attitude seep into his head. That's what kind of makes me angry. That it's so accepted and prevalent.

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Ok fellas final thought for everyone here. Bottom line here there was no communication by Express North coaches and the tournament directors (who did know whole time) that's another issue itself. It seems this was hush hush from the start about the older kids. They needed another team for the bracket. This tournament was for a great cause so let's not forget about that 🇺🇸. The directors and EN coaches should have told the other team coaches from the start about the kids. If both parties were straightforward we wouldn't be having this conversation. I can speak for myself that I would rather have my kid play up but NEVER PLAY DOWN. I don't mind when he plays up it will only get him better. Bottom line Express North took the easy route. Hopefully everyone learns from this.

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Ok fellas final thought for everyone here. Bottom line here there was no communication by Express North coaches and the tournament directors (who did know whole time) that's another issue itself. It seems this was hush hush from the start about the older kids. They needed another team for the bracket. This tournament was for a great cause so let's not forget about that 🇺🇸. The directors and EN coaches should have told the other team coaches from the start about the kids. If both parties were straightforward we wouldn't be having this conversation. I can speak for myself that I would rather have my kid play up but NEVER PLAY DOWN. I don't mind when he plays up it will only get him better. Bottom line Express North took the easy route. Hopefully everyone learns from this.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
In lacrosse, if you are not playing down, you are playing up. Get used to it. It is the norm. My experience has been that it is most prevalent in the Balt-DC area and in CT/Westchester area but no region is innocent. Not by a long shot.

I hate it and frankly laugh at those pathetic snowflakes that just need to be good at something, even if that means playing younger kids in order to show well.

It will stop when the college coaches stop encouraging it (never happen) or the insurance company that provides coverage for basically all players and teams (via US Lacrosse membership) demands that it stop.

I'd bet on the lawyers before the coaches though I'm surprised it hasn't happened yet. Thank goodness some poor kid hasn't been severely injured yet, but sadly that is what it might take.


Playing down is big in MA and PA also. Also keep in mind that even if a kid is "on grade" from MA, PA, MA, ect, they are still older than NYers playing "on grade" because of the older calendar year these other states use for their kids. For instance, and "on grade" 2023 team in NY has 11 and 12 year olds. In these other states, it is more like 12-13. You can put NJ in this category as well. "on grade" kids are older.

Westchester is not big on holdbacks. CT much more so. Issue is that certain teams have a mix of CT and Westchester kids so it becomes like a holdback team. A team that has only NY kids is much more likely to be "on grade".

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
In lacrosse, if you are not playing down, you are playing up. Get used to it. It is the norm. My experience has been that it is most prevalent in the Balt-DC area and in CT/Westchester area but no region is innocent. Not by a long shot.

I hate it and frankly laugh at those pathetic snowflakes that just need to be good at something, even if that means playing younger kids in order to show well.

It will stop when the college coaches stop encouraging it (never happen) or the insurance company that provides coverage for basically all players and teams (via US Lacrosse membership) demands that it stop.

I'd bet on the lawyers before the coaches though I'm surprised it hasn't happened yet. Thank goodness some poor kid hasn't been severely injured yet, but sadly that is what it might take.


Playing down is big in MA and PA also. Also keep in mind that even if a kid is "on grade" from MA, PA, MA, ect, they are still older than NYers playing "on grade" because of the older calendar year these other states use for their kids. For instance, and "on grade" 2023 team in NY has 11 and 12 year olds. In these other states, it is more like 12-13. You can put NJ in this category as well. "on grade" kids are older.

Westchester is not big on holdbacks. CT much more so. Issue is that certain teams have a mix of CT and Westchester kids so it becomes like a holdback team. A team that has only NY kids is much more likely to be "on grade".


Every team our 2021 team plays has at least half the kids playing down (older kids). Why is this instance of Express (for once??) have older kids playing? Give me a break. Laxachussets, HHH, MADlax, Edge, Prime Time, ADVANC, etc etc .......you people can't be serious whining about one time the Express had older kids play down. Go to age based bracketing and enforce it like soccer and football or everyone needs to stop complaining.

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Agree 3 days now of this nonsense

Not one player was hurt safety was never an issue LiE may have been bigger faster and better players but they were respectful stop the madness stop the commenting move on and enjoy your day life is too short

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Unless your Express, 90+1 and Igloo

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This absurd.. to me its impossible to,defend having players play down for any reason. I have no dog in the fight but playing down should never be allowed.

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Originally Posted by meco24
Man that stinks. Personally I can't stand when there are accusations against other players. I'm not naive, but I'm not the type to accuse someone of being older no matter how big/strong/fast/skilled they are. There was just one time in the 50+ games over the last 3+ years that I was convinced someone was too old. And that was back in 1st grade... No matter how much my radar is going off, I keep it to myself and make sure my son doesn't get jilted into believing anyone better than him or his teammates must be older. I won't let that attitude seep into his head. That's what kind of makes me angry. That it's so accepted and prevalent.


That's a very clever way of defending hold backs. Nice try.

I never said they are necessarily better. In fact, many are worse.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
This absurd.. to me its impossible to,defend having players play down for any reason. I have no dog in the fight but playing down should never be allowed.


You never read that. No one is defending it. The argument was that the parents are more concerned with winning , not the safety of their kids. If they were the child would have been pulled from competition.

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LOL.. Many are defending it. Ive see multiple comments saying how its ok cause its for charity and it was last minute. Also the old everyone is doing it!

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Originally Posted by meco24
Man that stinks. Personally I can't stand when there are accusations against other players. I'm not naive, but I'm not the type to accuse someone of being older no matter how big/strong/fast/skilled they are. There was just one time in the 50+ games over the last 3+ years that I was convinced someone was too old. And that was back in 1st grade... No matter how much my radar is going off, I keep it to myself and make sure my son doesn't get jilted into believing anyone better than him or his teammates must be older. I won't let that attitude seep into his head. That's what kind of makes me angry. That it's so accepted and prevalent.


That's a very clever way of defending hold backs. Nice try.

I never said they are necessarily better. In fact, many are worse.


huh? I'm not defending holdbacks by any means.

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Valid lessons for this weekend for all the boys out there:

1. Some people don't play by the rules and sometimes that impacts you.
2. If they run faster, play harder, and shoot better they will win the game.
3. If you are mad that you lost improve for the next time.
4. Practice like you are playing don't play practice.
5. Beware of adults with Solo Cups they act different than adults without them.
6. It's not just a game to some people and that's ok.
7. Everyone will bend the rules because the rules apply to everyone else but them.
8. Play hard until the end even if the game is 8-1 because 10-3 is much better than 10-0 even though 10-3 still sucks.
9. Respect your opponent on and off the field shake hands when your done and say good game even if you know in your heart that they are cheating.
10. Respect the refs they really don't give a crap who wins or loses or if they get the calls right. ( See #5 ).
11. What you do on the field doesn't define who you are but how you act on the field and off the field does.

If you have any more you can add to this list lets keep this going so we can really make this a learning experience for the boys like everyone keeps saying

Keep it going BOTC community!!!



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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
This absurd.. to me its impossible to,defend having players play down for any reason. I have no dog in the fight but playing down should never be allowed.


You never read that. No one is defending it. The argument was that the parents are more concerned with winning , not the safety of their kids. If they were the child would have been pulled from competition.


You must not be reading the posts over on the other two boards for recruiting and this topic specifically. The more recent comments there are all about defending, if not outright advocating for holdbacks/reclass/etc.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Valid lessons for this weekend for all the boys out there:

1. Some people don't play by the rules and sometimes that impacts you.
2. If they run faster, play harder, and shoot better they will win the game.
3. If you are mad that you lost improve for the next time.
4. Practice like you are playing don't play practice.
5. Beware of adults with Solo Cups they act different than adults without them.
6. It's not just a game to some people and that's ok.
7. Everyone will bend the rules because the rules apply to everyone else but them.
8. Play hard until the end even if the game is 8-1 because 10-3 is much better than 10-0 even though 10-3 still sucks.
9. Respect your opponent on and off the field shake hands when your done and say good game even if you know in your heart that they are cheating.
10. Respect the refs they really don't give a crap who wins or loses or if they get the calls right. ( See #5 ).
11. What you do on the field doesn't define who you are but how you act on the field and off the field does.

If you have any more you can add to this list lets keep this going so we can really make this a learning experience for the boys like everyone keeps saying

Keep it going BOTC community!!!




Fantastic list!!! Here is one more:
12. Solo Cup accusations should only be used if and only if there were actually drunk parents.

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Kids get better playing against better competition and sometimes playing up. Ltown should just consider that they played up in the championship and their kids improved from it. No one got hurt so get over the loss and move on..

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Valid lessons for this weekend for all the boys out there:

1. Some people don't play by the rules and sometimes that impacts you.
2. If they run faster, play harder, and shoot better they will win the game.
3. If you are mad that you lost improve for the next time.
4. Practice like you are playing don't play practice.
5. Beware of adults with Solo Cups they act different than adults without them.
6. It's not just a game to some people and that's ok.
7. Everyone will bend the rules because the rules apply to everyone else but them.
8. Play hard until the end even if the game is 8-1 because 10-3 is much better than 10-0 even though 10-3 still sucks.
9. Respect your opponent on and off the field shake hands when your done and say good game even if you know in your heart that they are cheating.
10. Respect the refs they really don't give a crap who wins or loses or if they get the calls right. ( See #5 ).
11. What you do on the field doesn't define who you are but how you act on the field and off the field does.

If you have any more you can add to this list lets keep this going so we can really make this a learning experience for the boys like everyone keeps saying

Keep it going BOTC community!!!




Most boys don't read BOTC (THANK GOD!), so making lists for them here is kind of pointless . . .

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Valid lessons for this weekend for all the boys out there:

1. Some people don't play by the rules and sometimes that impacts you.
2. If they run faster, play harder, and shoot better they will win the game.
3. If you are mad that you lost improve for the next time.
4. Practice like you are playing don't play practice.
5. Beware of adults with Solo Cups they act different than adults without them.
6. It's not just a game to some people and that's ok.
7. Everyone will bend the rules because the rules apply to everyone else but them.
8. Play hard until the end even if the game is 8-1 because 10-3 is much better than 10-0 even though 10-3 still sucks.
9. Respect your opponent on and off the field shake hands when your done and say good game even if you know in your heart that they are cheating.
10. Respect the refs they really don't give a crap who wins or loses or if they get the calls right. ( See #5 ).
11. What you do on the field doesn't define who you are but how you act on the field and off the field does.

If you have any more you can add to this list lets keep this going so we can really make this a learning experience for the boys like everyone keeps saying

Keep it going BOTC community!!!




The problem with some of this (the parts that concern rules and following them) is that when young kids see cheating be rewarded and condoned, they learn to cheat themselves. This is exactly NOT what I want my kids to learn. So I wholeheartedly disagreed that we should be teaching 10 year olds that "some people cheat - such is life, deal with it and move on." This is not too different than teaching them cheating is ok.

Instead, kids should be taught that when someone is cheating, good people should do something about it. They will have to learn the nuances of how to do this when they get older, but the core message should be that cheating is not acceptable and they should know that he adults around them (parents, coaches, teammate and friend parents) don't tolerate it.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Originally Posted by Anonymous
Valid lessons for this weekend for all the boys out there:

1. Some people don't play by the rules and sometimes that impacts you.
2. If they run faster, play harder, and shoot better they will win the game.
3. If you are mad that you lost improve for the next time.
4. Practice like you are playing don't play practice.
5. Beware of adults with Solo Cups they act different than adults without them.
6. It's not just a game to some people and that's ok.
7. Everyone will bend the rules because the rules apply to everyone else but them.
8. Play hard until the end even if the game is 8-1 because 10-3 is much better than 10-0 even though 10-3 still sucks.
9. Respect your opponent on and off the field shake hands when your done and say good game even if you know in your heart that they are cheating.
10. Respect the refs they really don't give a crap who wins or loses or if they get the calls right. ( See #5 ).
11. What you do on the field doesn't define who you are but how you act on the field and off the field does.

If you have any more you can add to this list lets keep this going so we can really make this a learning experience for the boys like everyone keeps saying

Keep it going BOTC community!!!




The problem with some of this (the parts that concern rules and following them) is that when young kids see cheating be rewarded and condoned, they learn to cheat themselves. This is exactly NOT what I want my kids to learn. So I wholeheartedly disagreed that we should be teaching 10 year olds that "some people cheat - such is life, deal with it and move on." This is not too different than teaching them cheating is ok.

Instead, kids should be taught that when someone is cheating, good people should do something about it. They will have to learn the nuances of how to do this when they get older, but the core message should be that cheating is not acceptable and they should know that he adults around them (parents, coaches, teammate and friend parents) don't tolerate it.


Well unless you pulled your son from the game and left you did nothing to impart upon him the importance of playing ny the rules. The problem with the holdback argument is that everyone is waiting for someone else to fix it. Not happening, so be a revolutionary and do it yourself!

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Add:
Kids should never give up. They need to hard for *every goal or every save* until the very end -even when you are losing by a large amount. It does count in real tournaments in terms of standings with goals against.

Kids should know that cheating isn't "cheating when the rules have been adjusted by the person/people in charge. And if you aren't happy with the situation of a serious disadvantage - handle it like a mature adult. Register a complaint with the Tournament director, contact the Program director of the offending team and contact your own program director. Running off to social media to air your grievances - questionable intent there.

Interesting that as responsible parents, we tell our kids not to take their personal gripes to social media because there is always more to the story and it causes divisiveness and bullying. I guess this was a Do as I say, not as I do situation?

Parents of younger players should know - college coaches are interested in the behavior of the kids on and off the field - and their parents/family play a part on that checklist as well. A black X on the sheet, no matter what column it's in isn't easy to shake. I know you are talking about 3rd graders here, but the time goes quick and it's a small group of lax folks that you run into all the time. The program directors you are slamming on this or any other site/anywhere else could help or hurt your son's chance. You need to be calculated & pick your battles. If your kid is from a whacky family & you get yourself a reputation for causing drama - the college coaches will undoubtedly hear about it. They don't need the drama or your kid at their school no matter how good he/she is.

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Originally Posted by Anonymous
Add:
Kids should never give up. They need to hard for *every goal or every save* until the very end -even when you are losing by a large amount. It does count in real tournaments in terms of standings with goals against.

Kids should know that cheating isn't "cheating when the rules have been adjusted by the person/people in charge. And if you aren't happy with the situation of a serious disadvantage - handle it like a mature adult. Register a complaint with the Tournament director, contact the Program director of the offending team and contact your own program director. Running off to social media to air your grievances - questionable intent there.

Interesting that as responsible parents, we tell our kids not to take their personal gripes to social media because there is always more to the story and it causes divisiveness and bullying. I guess this was a Do as I say, not as I do situation?

Parents of younger players should know - college coaches are interested in the behavior of the kids on and off the field - and their parents/family play a part on that checklist as well. A black X on the sheet, no matter what column it's in isn't easy to shake. I know you are talking about 3rd graders here, but the time goes quick and it's a small group of lax folks that you run into all the time. The program directors you are slamming on this or any other site/anywhere else could help or hurt your son's chance. You need to be calculated & pick your battles. If your kid is from a whacky family & you get yourself a reputation for causing drama - the college coaches will undoubtedly hear about it. They don't need the drama or your kid at their school no matter how good he/she is.


How do you know that the ONLY way some are addressing the age thing is via social media/BOTC?? You could be doing things elsewhere AND also posting here or elsewhere on social media.

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you back up my point completely The problem with slamming on social media is that no one knows the full story.

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t

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don't get the two year age problem really don't see anyone getting pissed when a freshman is asked to play up on a high school team where the age gap could be 2-4 years

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