Maybe it is less stressful because you are visiting and you know it’s because they want her? That wasn’t our experience— my daughter got the calls, went to visit, but it felt more like an audition and not a courtship. It’s a shame but on our end I think we will probably take a step back. It’s just not sustainable.
I think you will find that some of the schools that had her visit, but didn't offer, will eventually start talking to her again. If they had her on an official visit, it most likely meant she was identified as a top recruit on their list, but they have a couple/few girls ranked ahead of her. If these girls commit elsewhere (some will, some won't) her value changes. I 100% know what you mean about the fatigue and feeling of audition. The coaches already know who they want before the girls arrive on campus, and I don't think (except in rare cases) that they change their minds during the visit. I know that on some of the visits my daughter went on, there were 5-8 girls. They also had 2 other visits. This means they potentially had 15 -20 girls on campus, but will likely recruit about 6-8. I also think that maybe 1-2 of those spots might be filled at camps and/or performance at the fall tournaments. It's a chess game, keep playing, and be smart![/quote]
Thanks so much to you (and others on here!) for your thoughtful responses about the process. Its so different for each kid. I am actually so thrilled for the kids for whom it's a breeze and it happens quickly and painlessly! I'm glad to hear we are not alone in the feeling of some fatigue. It's tough to go and leave with this fabulous impression of the place, and new relationships, and no offer. Tricky to navigate! Throw in some 16 year old hormones...what an experience!