I think you need to differentiate between being recruited and receiving emails from colleges. My son receives daily emails and has heard from dozens of D1 and D3 colleges but that doesn't mean he is being recruited. I think coaches buy lists from showcases, tourneys or club programs. If you are being recruited (hence college coach reached out to your HS or club coach to express interest), you will know. And for the record, exactly 1 college coach has reached out to our club team regarding my son.