Why does early commitment automatically equal living through your kids? Don't get me wrong, there is tons of that going on, but I'm not sure that is always the case.
It doesn't but you always have a few jealous losers who can't be happy for anyone who does better than their kid. Have spoken to many an early commit kid when they are in 11-12th grade and rarely if ever do they feel they made the wrong choice , if they did they would just decommit and go elsewhere .Guarantee that most if not all of these "I know what's better for your kid than you do " parents on here feel their kid was over looked so are bitter. Yes my kid was a relatively early commit and could not be happier for her as she enjoyed every second of the recruiting process. [/quote]
Congrats to you and your daughter. Completely agree with your post. The poison is not the parents of the early commits, its not the parents on the sideline, it comes from jealous parents who spew it on the internet. Not every early commit is a black hole, stat padding monster molded by their over the top parents who won't give you the time of day on the sidelines. There are lots of extremely talented, unselfish, team player girls with great parents out there too. If you people out there are stuck on a team with a black hole, that stinks, but don't apply your misery and situation to everyone else. Good luck. [/quote]
Early recruiting is killing the game of lacrosse. Lacrosse was always a great team sport and like many other team sports it teaches you about teamwork, sportsmanship, commitment and may other key qualities.
A report just came out from Boston College about the effects that helicopter parents are having on students in college and their inability to cope or adapt. The same thing is happening in lacrosse. Parents need to understand that it is ok for kids to make mistakes, it ok for kids to lose.
Do I think the NCAA and both coaches associations need to make changes to early recruiting - YES. However, parents can also play their own part and help your daughters (or sons) by slowing the process down. Don't worry about what the girl on your team is doing, worry about yourself. Pick a school because it is a great academic fit for your daughter. A Place she would be happy at if her lax career ended tomorrow. In reality her lax career will most likely end when she graduates unless she goes into coaching or is in the top half of 1 percent of all the players and plays for Team USA.
So due to early recruiting, we have seen a major shift in the game and how it is played. Instead of playing club lacrosse for the fun of it - parents only care about what are the recruiting chances for their daughter. This in turn makes lacrosse a job and it's not fun anymore. This also changes how the game is played - it turns into a me, me game where "I have to showcase what I can do." Parents feel that the best way their daughter can show case themselves is by scoring goals. How often do you hear on the sidelines - "go to goal, go, go." You don't hear look up - Susie is open - pass the ball. You do it hear that occasionally form Susie's parents who are constantly telling the coaches that know one passes the ball to Susie.
This shift in early recruiting is making parents try to force their kids onto varsity in 7th and 8th grade. Granted their will be the top 1% of layers who can handle this, bit the majority of them can not. So they sit on the varsity bench and wast an entire year where they could have been playing JV or middle school ball and gotten valuable playing experience. Parents will justify this by saying their daughters are getting valuable practice time against varsity level players. However, this is also not true. Many of these kids not only sit on the sidelines during games, but also at practices. How may HS games have you watched where they play 12-14 girls only?
Another part of this problem is the lack of quality coaching both at middle school and high school programs. May of these jobs go to teachers who don't have the necessary experience. We have seen this firsthand in Maryland where girls are told to NOT play on their middle school teams but play on their club teams in a spring league.
All of this is in a push to get their daughters committed early because they will lose their spot. For some of these early recruits (aa small percentage), they may have a dream school, maybe it's their parents alma matter. However, for the overwhelming majority we are asking 13-15 year kids to make a decision on their future where they are not capable of really making this decision. What are these kids shown on their recruiting trips - athletic facilities, fields, locker rooms, fancy training rooms, student athlete learning centers (which are not available to the general student body).
They are introduced to famous athletes to woo them to their respective school. You also have club programs that push certain schools - not because they have their players best academic interests in mind, but schools who can win a championship.
Does and 8th, 9th or 10th grader really know what they want to do with the rest of their life. No. Dod they know which school and which course of study will help them best - no.
Another issue with early recruiting is the problem with the socio economic disparity amongst families. A family for ma a ver wealthy area can afford to send their kids to limitless camps, clinics and campus visits - no matter where they are in the country. A family with lesser or no means can not make those trips. The NCAA makes available 5 paid recruiting trips. However, those are for the players' senior year. That is way too late.
So with all that being said - we have turned lacrosse into a me first sport. Go to any recruiting showcase and watch the ball hogs take over. Go to a summer tournament and listen to the parents scream at their kids to go to goal. Watch parents n the sidelines with stopwatches timing how long their kids have been on the bench and how long they are on the field.
We need to go back to teaching the game to be played the right way - like a team. Some of the greatest players to ever play the game were great because they made the players around them better. That is what great layers do.
We live in a world of helicopter parents. Kids are not allowed to make mistakes - and if the do it is someone else's fault. Let's go back to a time where we need to tell our kids that if they want something bad enough - they need to work for it. They can't just have mommy and daddy fight for it. And lastly to parents, when a college coach asks yourHS or Club Coach - what type of parents are they? What do you want them to say? [/quote]
Great post after the first few sentences it was obvious you weren't from LI you are way too sane. [/quote]
